I have moved

You can find me here now. Hope to see you.

Kind of depressed so let's post pictures of kitties!

So I thought I had money to do some Christmas shopping this paycheck. Turns out I forgot about the cable bill. I always forget about the cable bill. It's 212.50 and covers cable, internet and the phone and my God, that's really exprensive. We probably don't need all the stations we have but it is our only luxury so we're keeping it. For now. Plus, right now I am listening to The Eagles singing "Those Shoes" on Comcast's music channels. Love classic rock.

Because I am short on money, I'm not going to Rob and Betty's on Christmas Eve because I can't afford to buy them a gift.* Plus Keem isn't going home for Christmas so we're going to have a nice dinner and I might try to make a creme brulee. I got a creme brulee kit thing a few months back when Linen and Things first started closing their stores. It is my favorite dessert and I can't wait to try it out.

*I know they wouldn't care but I still feel bad about it.

Plus I have got to get my happy pills prescription refilled. This is not a good time of the year to run out of pills, especially with the suckiness of the economy. But there's another 25 bucks I am going to have to scrounge up from somewhere.

Oh well, in just 3 more payments, the lap top will be paid off and I can actually have some extra money again.

Anyway, here are pictures of the children. Well, mainly Kalli doing her best to destroy the household.

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Kalli will sometimes stop tearing around the apartment and stare at the television. Keem and I were watching "Dungeons and Dragons" last month and Kalli was fascinated. Especially by the dragons.





I did not throw her away, even though sometimes we think about it. She is kind of a pain.





Yes. That is a cat in our junk drawer.





I mentioned she has an addition for ice, right? She is constantly trying to get into our glasses and it is normal to come out in the morning and find the glasses on the floor.





The only way that Eddy gets treats is if we hide them from Kalli. We have to distract her with her own treats (which she typically will only eat if they are scattered on the coffee table. She has to stalk them and then knock them onto the floor. She's weird).





We bought the cats these crinkly bag toys - one is a tree and the other is a hat. Eddy loves to lie on them since he doesn't fit inside them. They are so spoiled.

As you can see, our freezer is fairly full but can still hold a kitten. This is her meet cat pose. Any time I go to get ice, she has to be there. Climbing all over the place and trying to dive into the glasses. How many people do you know that have to say "Cat, get out of the freezer."

And now, the many reasons why we aren't having a Christmas tree this year.

Here she has found the tree. Eddy likes to lie under the tree and pretend he is a present so we were hoping this was going to be the most she did. Ha.

Nope. Got to pretend she's an ornament.

Unplugging it didn't fool her. She knew it was still there.

And this is when she discovered she could climb the tree to get to the DVD rack and go from there to the bookshelf and the entertainment center.

I am also moving my blog over to Word Press. I've been on Blogger forever but Word Press has seduced me. I'll be keeping this blog up for awhile, probably until I either figure out how to add HaloScan comments to Word Press or move all of my HaloScan comments into Blogger. Stupid computers and their technology.

Anyway, here is the link. Hope to see you there.

Perhaps I might need more sleep

So part of my job is tracking who has sent in questions to our Electronic Library here at NABABNA.  We have a log that I have to type in information about who sent what and if we added it.  Last week, I was somewhat tired and found myself nodding off at my desk.  You know, your eyes start drooping, your head starts bobbing and next you know, you're drooling on your keyboard.  So far I've been able to avoid the keyboard drooling.

Anyway, I notice this happening last week and manage to wake myself up a little bit.  I stare at what I was typing.  It was supposed to be a brief description of a problem we had here, where we found out certain replacement checks had to be ordered through a different department instead of following our normal procedure.  But that's not what I wrote.  No, I ended up typing "Certain Department/Cowboys cannot work together."  What?  This makes no sense at all.  What does the certain department have against cowboys?  Is there a range feud? 

Today it happens again.  Except this time it is not in the log, it's in the actual Electronic Library.  The one that gets read daily by tons of people.  And what I've written could have been displayed on the front page for all to see that I am completely insane.

Today's information for the representatives?  "Information has been added to the Electronic Library about cashing pirates."

WTF?  Am I on drugs that I am not aware of?  Do I have a rich fantasy life involving work, pirates and cowboys?  I have no clue.  And the real question - since when can pirates be exchanged for goods and services?

Perhaps I am a bit vain

On Tuesday, in between my appointment at the doctor (where I got to have blood drawn and get stabbed twice (okay, I got a flu shot and a tetanus shot) in the shoulders) and the mammogram appointment at the hospital (where my breasts were slammed between cold plastic and turned into pancakes), my sister Kari and I went to get our hair cut.

I had originally thought about trying to see if I could pull off Maggie Gyllenhaal's most recent haircut (posted on Go Fug Yourself here) but Kari was flipping through books with different hair styles. And there I saw it. This cute, adorable pixie cut. Could I pull it off? Would it be too short? What the heck. I was going to try it.

My hair is now two inches long (except for my bangs, they are a tad shorter but have been fixed since my last "Oh my God, I can't stand my hair anymore. Where are the scissors?" breakdown) and, if I do say so myself, quite adorable. I love my hair. My hair loves me. I even styled it this morning.

As we were driving to the boob squishing appointment, Kari asked me what I thought of her hair cut. I told her I thought it was cute (it is).

Kari: I didn't really look at it.
DM: What? You didn't check it when she showed you the finished product?
Kari: No. I hate that part. I just want to say yes, yes, let me on my merry way.
DM: Wait. You mean you don't stare at yourself in the mirror and think about how cute you are?
Kari: No! Do you?
DM: Yes! That's my favorite part!
Kari: Well, obviously you don't have any self confidence issues.
DM: Why would I? I'm freakin' adorable! Who wouldn't love me? I'm me!

I have noticed that when I like my hair, I feel much better about myself. So hopefully, I'll continue this "Gosh, I am so great" feeling. Plus, very excited to learn that I lost a "couple" of pounds from the last time I went to the doctor. Yay!

I promise to post pictures of my hair and the cats soon, including the reason why Keem and I are not having a Christmas tree this year.

Finally it is over

I have done it. 30 days hath November and I have posted in every single one of them. Yay!

Today Kari and Josh came over. We went swimming, we played a game called Snortna (which Keem and I decided would make a great drinking game because we were laughing ourselves hysterically halfway through it) and then topped the evening watching the oddest thing I have ever seen on television. It was a spoof of Star Wars acted by thumbs. Yes. You heard me correctly. Thumbs. The world is such an odd place.

And they're off

I am sitting in the living room listening to Kalli call for Eddy. A few pathetic meows and he is investigating. He has not yet figured out that this typically means "Hey! Why don't you come and play with me? And by play, I mean I will attempt to eat your face. It's fun!"

Although today they seem to be actually playing together. She called to him, he went to Keem's room to find her and then chased her down the hallway. Then they did that half football game, half ballet dance that cats seem to do together. You know, tackle. Leap. Tackle. Leap, somersault, leap. Tackle.

Keem and I are going to meet my sister and nephew to see Madagascar 2. Keem won free movie tickets earlier this year so we're going to put them to good use. It is possible that Keem and I will attempt to do a double feature tomorrow because we both want to see Bolt and I really, really, really want to see Transporter 3. Hello. Jason Statham is hot. It may turn out to be a triple feature because we also want to see Four Christmases.

I managed to finish all of my monitorings for the month at 7:30 last night. The stress headache is gone for now but it will return about the middle of December.

Must go get ready, we're leaving soon. Have a great day! Only one more day left of NaBloPoMo. Thank God. I can't believe I've made it this far!

I am an evil, evil, evil, evil, evil person

I love Fail Blog and laughed so hysterically when I pulled this up on Bloglines this morning that I may have frightened Co-Worker Rykken.



Is it wrong that I really want the "Be like Jesus" t-shirt because it's so pathetically bad in its cheesiness? The stick figure Satan makes me giggle. Plus, you know, he is my boyfriend.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Today has been a good day. I didn't have to work (yay!) and got to be all lazy. Keem and I were going to do laundry but decided against it. We will tomorrow, probably. Yep. My life is filled with excitement. Friday night is laundry night. Woo-hoo!

I am thankful for:

Great friends like Keem and Beth
My family here, Kari, Eric and Josh and my mom who is in Arizona
The fact that I am working at a job I really do love even when it is stressing me out
The two best cats in the world, Eddy and Kalli.
The Big Bang Theory (the show, not the actual theory (Keem and I are watching the most recent episode for the 3rd time this week*)) - yes. I am thankful for TV. Shut up.
Many other things, including, but not limited to, happy pills. Thank you makers of Effexor.

*Can someone explain what throwing a digital sheep at someone on Facebook means? It was on the most recent episode and Keem and I don't get it.

Coming soon! Adorable pictures of my cats! I know you can't wait.

Having a kitten for the first time in nine years has been very interesting. Although I don't remember ever having to remove Eddy from the freezer. Now that Kalli is a little bit bigger, she has added a new twist to her quest for the ice cubes. She actually will climb into the freezer. I do not know of many people who have had to say to their cat "Please, for the love of God, get out of the ice cubes!"

Trying to be a better person

Okay, I am cranky. I admit it. I've been kind of cranky this entire month because someone who works here at NABABNA has crossed my path and I now feel the need to annihilate them.

This person (and I have not been able to establish if I am overreacting. I am possibly overreacting but dang it, my feelings are real and you have hurt them beyond repair (Okay, not really)) has done some things this month that have really irritated me and I want to talk about it but I really can't because, let's face it, I don't want to get fired for my blog. Or for possibly saying "Dear co-worker, I really want to stab you with a fork" to said person. Because, you know, it's really hard to get another job once you've said that. Or done it for that matter.

But the best part of this is that Co-Worker Jessica understands exactly what I am going through and is the vantee to my vanter (Vant, for those not in the know, is a word I coined years ago when I was still at NABABNA's main call center. It is a cross between vent and rant and sums it up perfectly). Today she was telling me that she can't control other's actions and so she takes deep breaths (yeah, she really is that perky) to help her deal with it.

So, when I got an email from the co-worker who I wish to strangle if she sends me one more email telling me how to do my job (okay, maybe it is not that extreme. Remember I said I might be overreacting?), I had to forward my complaint to Jessica.

To be on the safe side, I deleted everything except the last part. Otherwise, it is possible that someone would be able to figure it out.

From: DM
Sent: Tuesday, November 25, 2008 12:55 PM
To: Co-Worker Jessica
Subject: FW:

Oh, good Lord. Are you a bad word* idiot (not you, Jess, the irritating co-worker)?

Grumble, grumble, bad word, grumble.

Deep breaths.

Deep breaths not working. Banging head on desk.

*I try very hard not to swear at work. So instead of swearing, I say bad word a lot. It makes Jessica giggle.

I am trying to be a better person. I'm not succeeding. Also, I may have scared my co-workers when I hissed "Stop sending things to the Virtual Library" in a deep, gravely devil voice. Since I started out the day with 15 emails in there and have received about 20 more.

I love my job. I love my job. I love my job.

Hope everyone has a good Thanksgiving. I am actually cooking!* Be amazed.

*Technically I am cooking tonight. And what I am cooking is pretty easy because it is a Pampered Chef recipe for a turkey ring. And I'm substituting Rotisserie Chicken from Super Target for the turkey. But still, I am cooking.

Turkey Ring Recipe

2 pkg. refrigerated crescent rolls (garlic butter flavor because the only other ones left were reduced fat and can you say blech? I can)

2 cups chopped, cooked turkey (Or chicken if you can't find a stupid turkey loin at Super Target because they had to carry 500 20 pound turkeys instead. Convince roommate to chop chicken because the last time you tried using the Ultimate Chopper, your delicious Szechuan Chicken ended up being really spicy chicken pate)

1 1/4 cups grated Swiss Cheese
1/2 cup chopped celery (or none if you forgot to buy it)
1/2 cup sweetened, dried cranberries (the best part! I love Craisins!)
1 tbsp. dried parsley or 3 tbsp. fresh chopped parsley (whatever)
1/2 cup mayonnaise
2 tbsp. Dijon mustard (Please. I reject your Dijon mustard. I use yellow mustard. And possibly some of the Sweet and Nicely hot mustard from the Mustard Museum)

1/2 tsp. coarsely ground black pepper
1 egg white, lightly beaten (Oh, yeah. I forgot about this part)

Preheat oven to 375 degrees Fahrenheit. In mixing bowl, combine chicken, 1 cup of the cheese, celery, parsley, mayonnaise, mustard and black pepper; mix well (or combine everything if you are me).

Scoop filling evenly over desired crescent rolls that have been laid out in an overlapping circle pattern with long point to the outside like a starburst pattern. Bring long points over filling to center, joining with short points. Brush outside with egg white and sprinkle with remaining cheese (or don't. It'll still work). Bake in oven 25 to 30 minutes, until golden brown. Serves 8.

It is fantastic. I love it. I'm also going to try duplicating a Turkey Pasta Salad recipe that I'm addicted to. With chicken instead, of course.

Peggy Sue and Suicide on the Inside

Whenever Beth and I scrapbook, we typically have her iPod on shuffle.  She will put it on the play list she created for the road trip she took with her mom.  It’s a great play list, filled with all different genres of music.  Without fail, “Peggy Sue” by Buddy Holly will play.  And Beth and I will gleefully sing along.  We love the song but find it, well, not filled with the most brilliant lyrics in the world. 

Beth:  I bet if you counted, there won’t be more than 30 original words in this song.
DM:  Well, I do have to do a post.

Later

DM:  I bet someone said to him “Hey, Buddy, I bet you can’t write a song only using these words.”

And then we giggled for awhile because the idea of someone saying “Hey, Buddy” to Buddy Holly.  Which, okay, maybe you had to be there.

Peggy Sue – Buddy Holly

If you knew Peggy Sue
Then you'd know why I feel blue
About Peggy, 'bout Peggy Sue
Oh well, I love you, gal
Yes, I love you Peggy Sue

Peggy Sue, Peggy Sue
Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, Peggy Sue
Oh, my Peggy, my Peggy Sue
Oh, well, I love you gal
And I need you, Peggy Sue

I love you Peggy Sue
With a love so rare and true
Oh, Peggy, my Peggy Sue
Oh, well, I love you gal
Yes, I want you, Peggy Sue

Peggy Sue, Peggy Sue
Oh how my heart yearns for you
Oh, Pa-he-ggy, my Pa-he-ggy Sue
Oh, well, I love you gal
And I need you, Peggy Sue
Oh, well, I love you gal
Yes, I want you, Peggy Sue

Original words:

If.  You.  Knew.  Peggy.  Sue.  Then.  You’d.  Know.  Why.  I.  Feel.  Blue.  About (‘bout is not being counted).  Oh.  Well.  Love.  Gal.  Yes.  Pretty.  My.  Need.  With.  A.  So.  Rare.  And.  True.  Want.  How.  Heart.  Yearns.  For.

32 words.  32.  Wow.  That’s just really amazing.

And, although he wrote an entire song and actually became famous, I would like to point out that I once wrote a poem based on two words - Coral Reef.  It was at a English thing (conference, seminar, field trip) that I was invited to back in the early 80's (11th grade?  Maybe).

Suicide on the Inside

A splash.
Sinking slowly, hair streaming.
Down.
Lying on the bottom.
Feeling rough coral reef.
Smelling seaweed rot.
Dying.
A vision of my old life passes before my now dead eyes,
I am rising.
Gravity holds her force over me one last time.
A splash.
Breaking the surface.
Spectators scream in horror.
Man swims out,
tries to save me.
Fails.
Tears on my face are not my tears
but yours and the Sea's.
tears on your face because you did me wrong.
didn't care enough to love me.
Only to use me.
Fall on my face,
taste of salt.
Now that I am gone,
the cycle will continue.
Your turn is next.
The Sea will claim a new victim.
A splash.
Sinking slowly, hair streaming.
Down.

Oh, here are some more notes about the poem that I found:

A group of us at my high school were picked to attend this workshop. I was in the poetry workshop and the leader decided to have us all write a poem based on one element, we had to include a coral reef. It took me maybe 15 minutes to write? The leader asked for volunteers to read their poems and after listening to this guy read this rambling about someone named Bill (there is a Roseanne episode where Darlene is going to read her poem and the guy that goes before her rambles about a bird. It was very similar to the Bill poem), I decided to read mine. I finish. There is complete silence. One person whispers "Wow." That was it. It's actually one of my favorites. Well, I told you I was depressed in high school.

Maybe tomorrow you'll get to hear the saga about why I need to make sure there are no forks at my desk.  Real forks, I should say.  Plastic forks are okay.  You can't do any serious damage to people with them.

Moody Monday - Vengeful

I am not a big fan of the Monday. Especially this close to the end of the month. So yes, I'm falling back on The Daily Meme for some help here.

This one is called Moody Monday and suggests you post a picture of your mood. Today's mood is vengeful. Gosh, this is right up my alley today.

vengeful
1. Desiring vengeance; vindictive.
2. Indicating or proceeding from a desire for revenge.
3. Serving to exact vengeance.

Since I really have no life and the children (cats) are sparring in the living room, here are my babies with their most vengeful looks. And for the love of God, Kalli, leave Eddy alone. You would think that long lasting growl would be a clue that he wants you to leave him alone.



I am still fond of this picture, even though she isn't this small anymore. Every time I turn around, she is longer and fluffier. And not listening when I tell her to quit growing.



I like to think Eddy is telling Keem that this is revenge for Kalli. There are many times I catch him looking at us with this expression. The "Why did you think I needed a little sister?" look or, possibly more accurately, the "I am going to kill you in your sleep for this pain you have visited upon me." look.

Tired. Going to bed. Have to monitor 16 calls a day this week. 3 days left of it. Oh, and we can't put in any over time anymore. You have to tell me this now? So much for working late to get caught up. Grr.

I don't believe in Winter

Today Beth and I spent a lot of time scrapbooking. We also met Char for dinner at Texas Roadhouse. As always, when Beth and I spend time together, there are some weird things being said. And yes, usually they are from me.

*******************
I was telling Beth about Co-Worker Rykken's response when I said I didn't understand why Bryan was not famous and Nickelback was. Rykken had said "I often wonder about that myself." Rykken has never heard Bryan sing but understands the evilness that is Nickelback (for one thing, I hate the way their name is spelled because I always want to type Nickleback. That just makes more sense).

DM: I don't know why I hate them so much.
Beth: I don't know, maybe because they're no talen hacks who have tortured all of America. And at least some parts of Canada. I think they're from Canada. So probably all of Canada.

**********************
I have just completed a layout for my Portugal album (only 2 1/2 years after the trip, of course).

DM: Pretty. Pretty pages. Pretty.

I may have been stroking them gently.

Beth: Okay, that was weird.

**********************
We have gone to Texas Roadhouse. Our waiter has taken our order for appetizers and walked away.

Char leans over to Beth and says

Char: I may be wrong but I think our waiter might be gay.
DM: For a young 'un.

Beth and Char stare at me blankly.

DM: Eh. I'd do him.

Beth and Char start laughing hysterically.

DM: You didn't say he was cute, did you?

***********************
Beth looks at me sternly.

Beth: Did you put socks on today?

Char almost spits out her pop.

Beth: That sounded kind of weird, didn't it (or motherly or something)?

Char looks confused.

DM: I don't like to wear socks.

Our waiter walks up.

DM: I don't believe in Winter.
Waiter: Okay.
DM: Tries to explain in a rational manner. Fails.

See, the thing is, if I wear socks, that means I am acknowledging Winter's exhistence. And I like to pretend the son of a bitch doesn't exhist. It doesn't work very well.

Char: Is that like not believing in fairies?
DM: I believe in fairies. Just not Winter.

************************
Beth orders a baked potato with her meal. She asks for the butter and sour cream on the side. I also order a baked potato and ask for the potato to be loaded but want the butter and sour cream on the side. The waiter looks at me. I feel that I need to explain.

DM: I like to eat the cheese and bacon first.
Beth: I don't think you needed to explain your dining habits.
Waiter: I don't think that's crazy.

It is obvious he is lying from his expression. This is revealed when I return from the bathroom and found out that he told Beth and Char that he thought not believing in Winter was a little nuts.

*************************
We come back to Beth's to scrapbook. Char is going to hang out with us for a little while. I am becoming frustrated with a page layout. I am staring at the paper trimmer, trying to figure out measurements (never a good thing).

DM: Are these real inches?
Char: No. they're fake inches. They're posers.

I hold up the piece of paper I am trying to trim.

DM: Well this is 8 inches, right?
Beth: I don't know.
DM: Well, it's supposed to be 8 inches. It's 8 1/2 x 11 inch paper.
Beth: Then it is 8 1/2 inches.

I realize what I have just said. Beth and Char laugh hysterically. Beth hands me her pencil.

Beth: Write that down.

***********************
DM: I am being mocked again, aren't I?
Beth: Rightfully so.
Char: You'd think you'd recognize it by now, it happens so often.

**********************
It has been a good weekend. And now I am headed home. Hope you had a good weekend.

Reflection

I have a splitting headache so I am going to post quickly, take some ibuprofen and then enjoy a quick nap. I am over at Beth's and managed to complete two whole pages last night for my Portugal scrapbook! Whoo! I'll probably scrapbook more while she is at work but it is more fun when she is here.

Anyway, been visiting The Daily Meme every once in awhile when I am at a loss for words and found a photo hunt for Saturdays. Looks like fun. Today's topic was Reflection so I found some pictures I'm fond of taken over the years.



I like this one. It is from a trip to Canada that Beth and I took in May of 2006. I think it is cool that you can see the reflection of the trees in the rearview mirror but also see part of a picture on Beth's laptop.



This isn't the best picture but it is light reflecting off the water drops that are flying off of one of the waterfalls we stopped at on our way to Canada. I liked the way it looked.



I think we all know that I am fond of flamingos, right? What's not to like? They are pink and birds. Totally awesome.



August 5th, 2005. This was one of the many times Beth, Keem and I went to Manny's. I'm not sure why we went in August but hey, not going to complain about steak.



I'm quite proud of this picture. I like the sepia tone to it and it is one of three that I use as a backdrop on my work computer.



This is another one that I really like and also use as a backdrop at work. Plus I have it in a frame. I have a lot of pictures at work.



I have no idea how I got this to work. But I love it. What I really like about it is how the water is reflecting the green and yellow of the surrounding flowers and plants and you can only see them in the water. This is the 3rd work backdrop photo and they were all taken around the same time when Keem and I used to go walking and taking pictures. We want to start doing that again but of course winter is trying to thwart us.

Okay, all. Have a great weekend. Vittum out.

Tired and kind of cranky

It is getting to be close to the end of the month and I am very stressed out. Work has been crazy busy and I am extremely tense. My work load seems to have doubled and it is insane. But I have a nice weekend planned. Beth and I are going to scrapbook like crazy. I am looking forward to it.

Last night we went to karaoke and it was really slow. At one point Beth turned to me and said "And this is why we still go to karaoke." Bryan was singing "Halleluiah" from Shrek and it was beautiful.

This morning, Co-Worker Rykken asked how karaoke went and I was telling him and Christy about the song.

DM: I cannot understand why he is not famous and Nickelback is.

They were amused by that. I've mentioned that I hate Nickelback with the fierceness of a thousand burning suns, right?

Anyway, off to take a nap before Beth calls. Hope you all have had a good week.

Can you believe it is the 21st? The month is more than half over and I've made it every day so far. Amazing.

The oddness of the Keem

So Keem is telling me this morning about this odd dream she had. Long story short, she and Patrick Dempsey are wandering through this old building. Now I can think of worse things to dream about than spending time with Patrick Dempsey (had a serious crush on him after "Can't Buy Me Love") so I expect that this will be an interesting glimpse into my roommate's psyche.

And boy howdy, it is.

Apparently the old building is filled with lions and sharks. Together. Living in harmony.

DM: Are they land sharks?

Apparently not. Nor is the building filled with water. But the sharks are getting around somehow and they are hungry. So are the lions.

Keem: So I run off and leave Patrick Dempsey...
DM: Wait. You left him behind?
Keem: Yes.
DM: What happened?
Keem: The lions and sharks got him.
DM: You didn't go save him?
Keem: I'm not going into a room with lions and sharks!
DM: You let Patrick Dempsey die. I can't believe you let him die. That's so mean.
Keem: It was more of a "Save yourself" situation so I did.

After that, the dream turned into some weird thing where there was a fake T. Rex wandering around trying to kill Keem and one of our co-workers showed up and distracted the dinosaur with something shiny.

The dream reminded me of Saturday Night Live when it was funny and the Land Shark skit. I miss that skit. Let's see if it is on YouTube. I couldn't find it but I did find it here in case you need reminding of the greatness of the Land Shark.

The stuff great road trips are made of

I came across this picture on I Can Haz Cheezburger the other day and it made me laugh.

Last weekend, on our way home from La Crosse, I was getting really tired. Typically I am not allowed to sleep in the car but Keem was feeling sorry for me since it was a fairly hellish weekend (plus I took the hit from the exploding bottle of Welch's Grape soda for her) so she said it would be okay this one time.

But then she turned on the CD player. In the CD player is the CD, something Beth made for Keem years ago (possibly 8) and it has some great songs on it (The Devil Went Down to Georgia) and some horrible songs (anything by New Kids on the Block). We don't turn it on very often because it is skipping in a lot of places but when we do, the car transforms into the karaoke showdown.

Keem usually will not sing along in the car, not sure why. She's got a good voice and used to be in choir. But not everyone is like me and not afraid to make their voice heard so I deal with it. Plus, she typically tells me to stop singing with the radio because "Dana, you're not at karaoke."

But this CD offers sing along options. There is the aforementioned "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" which is hugely fun. Keem and I will try to keep up with the Charlie Daniels Band but typically fail horribly. Then we have to start the song over again. So this is what it usually sounds like:

K & DM: The devil went down to Georgia, he was looking for a soul to steal
DM: He was in a bind 'cause he was way hind.
Keem: Hind? What's a hind?
DM: A small deer. Shut up.

Then we start over.

K & DM: The boy said: "My name's Johnny and it might be a sin,
DM: But I'll take your bet, you son of a gret?
Keem: You're gonna regret. Dork.

And we start over.

K & DM: And if you win you get this shiny fiddle made of gold.
Keem: But if you lose, the devil gets your sooooooul (completely off key). Crap!

And we start over. This might be one of the reasons why the CD skips.

Personally I think the devil should have won. His fiddle playing was much better than Johnny's. "Granny, does your dog bite no, child, no" is one of the dumbest lines ever.

Also on the CD are some songs from Rocky Horror Picture Show.

There's the Time Warp, of course, as evidenced from the above picture. I still do not know what the words are after "And then a step to the right." I usually just sing nonsense words. Keem has not yet caught me. She might be singing nonsense words as well. Hmm, let's use our good friend, Google. Oh! Well, that makes sense.

With your hands on your hips
You bring your knees in tight
But it's the pelvic thrust that really drives you insane
Let's do the time warp again!

But the best possible song on this CD is sung by the wondrous Tim Curry. Any man that can look as good as he did wearing a corset and lipstick is fantastic. The little laugh he does at the end? Gets me every time.

So the weekend was kind of a bust but the road trip was fun. As long as you have good music and a good friend, the ride is more enjoyable. It would be better if we had a new CD made or maybe an iPod road trip doohickey but still, it was great.

This seems to me to be more of a Monday thing

It is 6:32 AM. Instead of lying in my cozy bed, hitting the snooze button repeatedly, I am in the living room. Do you know why I am in the living room? Because at 6 AM, keem woke me up to tell me there was water pouring from the light fixture in her bathroom.

The water has stopped but we are waiting for the engineer to come and do something. Not sure what. But neither Keem or I want to take a shower now because you just know that is when someone will come pounding on the door.

Right now Keem is sitting on the couch and Kalli is attacking her. This is what I am hearing:

"Ow. Ow. Ow. No. Not the fingers. Ow. Obviously you do not understand the language of Ow."

She (the kitten, not Keem) is insane. Eddy, who is an intelligent water-fearing cat, stayed far away from the bathroom during the water catastrophe. Kalli was inside it. Staring at the water with fascination. She is also obsessed with ice cubes and has climbed inside of the freezer several times to get closer to them when I'm filling my glass.

I am really tired and want to go to bed. Seems to me you should be handed a "get-out-of-work-free" pass on days like this.

Oh, the engineer just called. Apparently the idiots who live upstairs forgot to put the shower curtain inside of the bath tub. Brilliant.

I'd love to say I'm going back to bed but unfortunately I need to guard Keem against the possibility of the engineer walking in on her while she's in the shower.

This is not my week.

I do live in Minnesota

One of my co-workers sent this to me this morning.  I don’t know if this actually is a Jeff Foxworthy thing but it could be.  And it is very true.

Jeff Foxworthy on Minnesota:

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by - You might live in Minnesota (Okay, I personally think this is insane).

If you're proud that your state makes the national news 96 nights each year because International Falls is the coldest spot in the nation - You might live in Minnesota.

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March - You might live in Minnesota (Actually the Dairy Queen is open.  It’s the A&W that’s closed seasonally).

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time - You might live in Minnesota (I don’t actually wear shorts but I have worn capris and my heavy coat at the same time).

If you know how to say Wayzata (Why-zetta), Mahtomedi (Mah-toe-me-die), Cloquet (Clo-kay), Edina (Eee-dye-na) and Shakopee (Shock-oh-pee) - You might live in Minnesota.

If vacation means going "up north" for the weekend - You might live in Minnesota (Done it when I’ve gone to Brainerd for the weekend before.  Not for many years but it’s been there).

You measure distance in hours - You might live in Minnesota (I didn’t even realize I’ve done this before but I will typically say “It’s about 15 minutes” as opposed to “It’s about 5 miles.”

You know several people who have hit deer more than once - You might live in Minnesota.

You often switch from "Heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again - You might live in Minnesota (Or, in my case, you keep the air conditioning on throughout the winter).

You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching - You might live in Minnesota (fortunately I don’t know anyone who is that big of any idiot).

You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events - You might live in Minnesota (oh, dear God, no).

You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked - You might live in Minnesota (maybe in the 70’s).

You think of the major food groups as beer, fish, and Venison - You might live in Minnesota (No, Hell no and no).

You carry jumper cables in your car, and your girlfriend knows how to use them - You might live in Minnesota (I even know how to use jumper cables and I’ve never had a car).

There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Mill's Fleet Farm at any given time - You might live in Minnesota (Don’t spend that much time at the Farm but probably true).

You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit - You might live in Minnesota (ruins a good costume if you have to wear your coat over it).

Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow - You might live in Minnesota (true).

You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and of course, road construction - You might live in Minnesota (they forgot Mosquito season).

You can identify a southern or eastern accent - You might live in Minnesota (can’t everybody?).

Your idea of creative landscaping is a plastic deer next to your blue spruce - You might live in Minnesota (personally I prefer pink flamingos).

If "Down South" to you means Iowa - You might live in Minnesota.

You know "a brat" is something you eat - You might live in Minnesota (I had brats this weekend.  Yum).

You find -10 degrees "a little chilly" - You might live in Minnesota (depends on what time of the year it is (if we’ve had a cold snap of minus 30 degrees for a week or more at a time, then yes, minus 10 is “a little chilly.”)

You actually understand these jokes - You DO live in Minnesota (or Wisconsin).

Weird

I was just headed for bed when I realized I had not posted yet today. Glad I remembered.

Anyway, while sitting here, trying to figure out what I was going to post about, I just saw a Geico commercial. They are very, very, very weird. This was one of the Geico lizard talking to some woman while this crazy safari guy is following him. The crazy safari guy is hiding in a dumpster which gets picked up by a garbage truck.

I do not see what this has to do with auto insurance. But then, I don't really get the cavemen ones as well.

I did not get to go to Shopko. It was very sad. Plus I had a bottle of Welch's Grape soda explode over me in the car. This has not been my weekend.

Grr

So my exciting trip to LaCrosse has so far been kind of a bust. Keem and I left work early yesterday and we were off. I was excited about the chance of eating her mother's Chinese Hot Dish (which is very much what my Grandmother used to make but we called it Chow Mein).

Keem and her parents went out to dinner with her aunt and uncle and cousins. I did not go. I was invited but, let's face it, I'm kind of anti-social. The thought of meeting new people kind of bothers me. I'm not sure why. Once I actually meet the people, I'm fine but I don't look forward to doing it. So when I was offered the chance to stay home, play on the computer and hang out on my own, I was all for it.

Today, Keem, her mother and I headed to Majestic Pines for some fun. Except I was sitting in the back seat and started to feel sick. Usually I can combat car sickness by reading but it wasn't going away. Kathy (Keem's mom) was surprised to hear that I get car sick if I don't read. Everyone else is the exact opposite. I've always been able to read in the car.

Keem and my former roommate Jeff called right when we pulled up to the casino. We talked to him for a little bit and then went inside. Some woman admired my shirt and another woman told me how much she loved my purse. And it was her birthday. Oh, and she was kind of drunk. I figured that out when she kept fondling my purse. I waved goodbye to the money I had earmarked for the casino and then we headed back to LaCrosse.

I was not feeling good again and really felt sick to my stomach. I was sipping my Orange Hi-C that we got from McDonalds this morning and all of sudden I knew what was going to happen. I gasped out "I'm going to throw up." Kathy looked at me and said "Oh, you don't want to do that." I replied "No, I really don't."

Another sip of Hi-C, trying to calm my stomach and then I ripped the lid off the glass and proceeded to start throwing up. It was lots and lots of fun. Kathy pulled over and I heaved all over the side of the road for awhile.

That was fun. Woo-hoo!

It helped though. Right now I feel better, still slightly sick but a good dinner of Brats and roasted potatoes has helped. But I think I'm going to bed early tonight. Hopefully tomorrow will go as planned, a trip to Shopko where I hope to find the newest JD Robb book on sale.

I hope you're having a much better weekend.