Kitten of the Corn - a photo essay

Hello! My name is Kalli and this is my big brother Eddy. I adore him and like to cuddle and spend lots of time with him because I am just the sweetest kitten in the world. Don't you just want to pick me up and kiss me over and over again? Of course you do.



Here I am delicately licking my paw. When I drink water, sometimes I drink it in a normal manner by applying my tongue directly to the water itself. But other times, to increase my absolute cuteness, I will dip my paw in the water and then lick it off. Aren't I angelic in nature? Yes, yes, I am.



Do you know why I do that? Because I am fascinated with water. I know I should be afraid of it like other cats. But I'm not like other cats. I'm different. I'm special. Sometimes I like to hop into the shower with Keem. It's fun.



I really like to snuggle with the humans. Humans are also fascinating. Like really large beings that I can walk all over and they don't even care.



They say "Oh, Kalli, please stop biting your brother."



Or "Kalli, please, for the love of God, leave my toes alone." But they don't do anything about it.

Do you know why? It is because I am their Kitten Overlord. They must obey. Resistance is futile.

Note from Dana:

So yesterday I was home sick (again. Enough with the cold already). Remember those episodes of the Road Runner when Wile E. Coyote would chase after the Road Runner and end up running off the side of the road? I heard this scrabbling noise yesterday and turned to see Kalli's head suspended over the counter, her paws flailing frantically. Then there is a crash and I run to the kitchen expecting to see my poor wounded baby bleeding and broken from the butter dish she managed to pull down with her. But she's not. Instead she's batting around the broken glass. Great. And when I try to sweep it up, she thinks that I'm playing with her. She is such a dork.

I ended up calling Kalli kitten of the corn because of the butter dish and then she tore the springy thing on the door off (what are those springy things on the door called? Door stops?) and batted it around the apartment for awhile. Plus there was the constant attacking of Eddy. How do you persuade a kitten that everything in the apartment is not a toy? The spray bottle works a little bit but I can't use it when she attacks Eddy. It's not fair to spray him as well.

Sigh. I love her. She's a sweet, sweet kitty when she wants to be. But I am really beginning to think she might be a tiny little bit evil.