Cheeseburger in Paradise lyrics

According to Bryan, this is the world's most homoerotic song. After reading the lyrics, you might just agree.

Cheeseburger in Paradise - Jimmy Buffet

Tried to amend my carnivorous habits
Made it nearly seventy days
Losin' weight without speed, eatin' sunflower seeds
Drinkin' lots of carrot juice and soakin' up rays
But at night I'd have these wonderful dreams
Some kind of sensuous treat
Not zucchini, fettucini or bulgar wheat
But a big warm bun and a huge hunk of meat

Cheeseburger in paradise
Heaven on earth with an onion slice
Not too particular, not too precise
I'm just a cheeseburger in paradise

Heard about the old time sailor men
They eat the same thing again and again
Warm beer and bread they said could raise the dead
Well it reminds me of the menu at a Holiday Inn
But times have changed for sailors these days
When I'm in port I get what I need
Not just Havanas or bananas or daiquiris
But that American creation on which I feed

Cheeseburger in paradise
Medium rare with mustard be nice
Heaven on earth with an onion slice
I'm just a cheeseburger in paradise

I like mine with lettuce and tomato
Heinz 57 and French fried potatoes
Big kosher pickle and a cold draft beer
Well good God almighty which way do I steer for my

Cheeseburger in paradise
Makin' the best of every virtue and vice
Worth every damn bit of sacrifice to get a
Cheeseburger in paradise

I need a cheeseburger in paradise
I'm just a cheeseburger in paradise