Saturday, December 24, 2005

Hey. Doesn't that guy look like a peanut?

Beth picked me up and we headed to the Chalet. The place was busy but not as packed as it was last Thursday. We were able to get a table sitting right behind Joe Funko, Reverend James and their friend Jay. The topic came up about how the men had all met their significant others. Both Joe and Jay had met their wives at work and R James met Marion when he came into her work to sing karaoke.

There was a table up close to the stage that was filled with some younger kids (okay, they were probably around 23-24 but they were kids to me. Probably the way they were acting) and then next to Joe there were two older women, probably in their late forties. We noticed right away that one of the women was acting rather drunk. I swear I watched her do the macarena. Probably not but she was flailing her arms all over the place.

Joe mentioned that she had bumped her chest into his head and then said "Oops." He said "If I bumped my crotch into someone and then just said 'Oops', I'd probably get arrested." The woman was doing her best to attract Joe's attention but he ignored her. She finally headed up towards the stage and started dancing in front of one of the guys at the table. Given a little more time and a tad more to drink, I think she would have given him a lap dance.

Later on a group of men and women came in. There was one guy called Jimmy who was a pretty good singer but kind of weird. His table started singing acapella "Brown Eyed Girl" R James joined in and I was singing along as well. One of the women at the table started talking to R James and he referred to this as armchair karaoke. She then told him she wanted to sing the song with him. He was okay with that.

Joe was telling us that R James had it so rough, he was athletic and good looking and women just gravitated to him. But, in this case, it was a bad thing. Not that this woman was bad looking or anything, she was just, oh, twice his age. But that didn't stop her from fawning all over R James, telling him that he could be her brown eyed boy. When she came over and started hanging all over him, it was hard to keep from laughing.

Back at the future lap dancer's table, some guy had joined them. He was a small, brownish looking man and looked familiar to me. I figured out why when I saw the commercial for Mr. Peanut on the television. The guy looked exactly like a walking, talking peanut. After the two women left, he stayed. And then fell asleep at the table. Beth told Joe she needed to take a picture of him and used it as an excuse to snap the peanut man's picture. I'm sure she'll post it soon.

Karaoke shut down early and we had a great time talking to Joe and R James and Liz when she joined us. We got to watch Andrew wake up peanut man twice and watched him finally stagger out of the bar. He dropped his cigarettes and Joe tried to give them to Liz but she refused, stating that he looked like the type of man who wouldn't wash his hands after going to the bathroom so no way was she touching his cigarettes.

The evening ended with a discussion about the local strip club, the Lamplighter. I told the story about how I had been at a garage sale and found a baseball jacket that I really liked, it was comfortable and fit well. It wasn't until I was at school one day that someone asked me if I worked there. I was very puzzled and that's when I discovered that the Lamplighter was a strip club. I also shared my opinion that there's something wrong with a strip club being in a strip mall.

Anyway, I'm off to Eric's dad's house to celebrate Christmas Eve. Hope you all have a great holiday, no matter what you celebrate or don't. Love to you all!