Lady looks like a dude

I was called "Sir" yesterday on the elevator. I went to push the button and the guy standing next to me said "Oh, excuse me, sir." You will be pleased to know that I did not punch him.

Now, I recently handed Keem the clippers and said "Cut my hair." Which is a lot of fun to do to an excessively yellow person (It's weird, before I started working at NABABNA, I had no idea what red or blue or yellow or green meant, other than they were colors, and now, if you ask me to describe myself, the first words I will say are "I'm red"). She always needs to be in control and was complaining about not having a plan. So cutting my hair was a serious problem for her. Here is our conversation, more or less.

DM: Cut my hair.
K: How short do you want it?
DM: I don't know. Just cut it.
K: But...
DM: Surprise me.
K: I don't know...
DM: Keem. I don't care. Just cut it.
K: Fine.

She takes the clippers and runs it over my head.

K: How's that?
DM (running fingers over head): It needs to be shorter.
K: How short?
DM: I don't know. Just shorter.

God, I love doing that to her. Messing up her little controlled world, it's great. I love using my redness for good and evil.

So, anyway, my hair is extremely short. Maybe a half inch in the back and on the sides and an inch, maybe an inch and a half on the top. I love having short, short hair. It makes life so simple. I wake up. I take a shower. I put some stuff in my hair. I go to work. That's it. Well, I do get dressed first but you get the point.

However, when I get into the elevator, I am wearing shorts, a bright pink tank top and carrying my purse. How the hell do you get sir from that? Before you make a judgement about someone, just based on their hair, look at the whole picture. I will have to do another post based on my boss and some of the comments he had about my hair and why I am going to kill him and not a single jury would convict me (actually, he's a really great guy, we just have an odd relationship, he's the annoying little brother I never wanted).

Anyway, I have to go back to work. I just needed to get that off of my chest. Thank you for time.